I finally finished Squid Game. It’s a show on Netflix. While it’s not for everyone, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Three seasons of brilliant writing, superbly cast and executed. The ending: Perfection.

Oh, and it was super hard waiting for the release of each season. But that’s when you know it’s good!

***

After messaging a bit on Match.com, Mike and I decided to meet in person at Pancho’s, a Mexican restaurant close to where we both live. We ended up talking for hours and actually closed the place. The staff was great and allowed us to stay while they cleaned around us.

When they finally kicked us out, we shared an amazing kiss in the parking lot and agreed to talk the next day.

I drove home with a huge smile on my face that has never left. Weeks later, Mike confided in me that he drove home screaming and singing out his windows. And then he said something no one had ever said before. “I just want you to know that I’m not going to mess this up.”

I was so touched by that. I thought “Where have you been all my life?”

As the days and weeks passed, we bonded over a mutual love of all things horror, movies in general and Halloween. Being only nine months apart in age, and both from the Class of ’89, it was as if we grew up together. We remember the big deal stuff like Atari and MTV, the first computer coming out and, of course, cellphones along with the many favorite ‘80s movies that we both still watch over and over again.

***

Growing up, one of my most treasured memories are what I call the Sunday ritual. My mom made sure to take us girls to church every Sunday. We’d always go to McDonald’s afterwards for lunch (back then, Happy Meals had really great surprises like glasses, plates, not junky toys like now), and then to the movies.

Oh, how I loved Sundays!

I attended Catholic school from kindergarten through 8th grade, so church was a part of my life from a very young age and I enjoyed it. I was even an altar server (a very good experience) for a few years.

Church was, and still is, a very peaceful and safe space for me. I confided in God early on in life about everything. I trusted He was listening. I gave Him all of my worries and fears. I never felt “alone”. I had faith before I really even understood what it was.

My absolute favorite part of church was the priest’s homily. The really good priests could deliver an uplifting and inspiring message. I especially enjoyed when they’d make it relatable to everyday life; movies, songs, stories from around the world.

When Christopher Reeve had his tragic horse riding accident, I remember how devastating it was for the fans and the priest delivered a very moving homily incorporating that story. It brought great comfort to me and inspired me to make that part of my own writing style; relating life experiences to deliver a more impactful message to my readers.

I had a strong love of words early on in my schooling and discovered not only did I enjoy writing but I was really good with spelling. I even won my school’s spelling bee in 6th grade and went on to a larger competition where I competed with students from area schools to go on to the Nationals.

Unfortunately, I was so nervous and I choked in the first round.

The word: goner.

(A simple word, I know.)

Here’s what happened… think of how you say the word “gone”. Phonetically, it is “gawn”.

The woman on the panel pronounced it “gon-ner”.

I drew a blank in my brain. I asked for it to be repeated.

The three members on the panel conferred and then the woman said it a different way: “gaw-ner”.

At that point, with hundreds of eyes on me and feeling panicked, I blurted out g-a-w-n-e-r.

After I realized what the word was and that I, indeed, was a goner, I was so embarrassed and disgusted with myself. It haunted me for years afterwards.

It’s kind of funny now, actually, because what I do for a living is strictly phonetic-based. So it makes sense to me why that simple difference in pronunciation made me stumble even though I was years away from knowing what I would do for a living when I grew up.

***

If Mike’s story was a movie, this week would represent the climax, the turning point for the protagonist. In the beginning, we endured uncomfortable and difficult to watch scenes accompanied by somber music and lighting that pulled us into the devastation of Mike’s world after the stroke.

Now, we are about halfway through the movie and the tone has drastically changed. The music is slowly building to a more uplifting score as we eagerly await the outcome of the sequence of scenes where we see him working hard, grimacing in pain at times but getting stronger right before our very eyes. Holding our collective breath as he starts taking unsteady steps under his own power and direction.

Watching this man, once so strong and conquering mountains, struggling to walk 10 feet in front of him causes a lump in our throats as we attempt to fight back tears of sorrow and pity.

But through flashbacks, we are reminded of how far he’s come. From the hospital bed, barely able to sit up without assistance, not being able to even move his left side at all, to now lifting both his left arm and leg up higher and higher from a seated position every time he tries.

Walking around his kitchen bar area, doing one lap and then going on to multiple laps before tiring.

Seeing his facial droop lessen almost daily and that left side showing more response to his beautiful smile.

We see Mike’s graduation day from home therapy services. The therapists, who all enjoyed working with him, wishing him well and even shedding some tears as they depart.

The next scene is waiting to be written but promises to be a good one. Monday, August 4th begins 90-minute sessions of private therapy. Five days a week. For the entire month!! Outpatient therapy at Sunnyview is imminent. Just waiting to be scheduled by the team.

***

Mike has been able to watch TV and see more on the screen. While his left eye still has a gap in vision, his right eye is coming back quite significantly. He is still in Season 2 of Squid Game, and as we watch together, we chat about how insane it would be if this was a real thing and how we would handle it.

He is confident he could do it and not be scared. I am like “Nope, I’d be a goner from the start!”

He snaps at me, “Don’t say that! Besides, you’re so smart, you wouldn’t be in that position to begin with.”

Sigh.

I kiss him, thank him and say, “Where have you been all my life?”